situationally ironical.

So, let me get this straight.

You don’t want a relationship because you don’t have a car, because without a car you can’t get a job and without a job or a car — you’re unattractive. I don’t understand how your physical appearence gets pulled into play there, but that’s a reasonable argument as long as I’m not already mere moments from shoving your own cell phone down your throat.

Also, “it’s not like anyone’s willing to drive 40 minuets to see me.” No. Absolutely not. You know what would look really cute being shoved down your throat? A cactus. With a bee hive in it.

Oh, and this gem.

me - “so, you’re saying I can go blow other dudes?”

you - “yeah, well, we’re not together.”

me - “okay, cool.”

you - “… that doesn’t mean you should do it!”

WELL THEN, what the fuck does it mean? If you’re not going to satisfy me emotionally, why can’t I orally pleasure someone who does if I fucking felt like it? Maybe I want too. Maybe I want to have my cake and eat it too. I’m sick of you getting your cake, eating it like a starved puppy, and then asking for more. Hey, Fuckface, I did a lot of work making and decorating that cake and you’re just gonna stuff your face and not even appreciate my hard work? Wll then, enjoy the last crumbs left on your plant, because this bakery is out of business.

I’m not interested in this “friendship,” “relationship”… whatever we are, anymore. We’re not friends. If you were my friend, you’d realize you’ve been hurting me for a while and I’m fed up. I don’t care anymore.